Blue (boo hoo) Cheese

Bring on the sushi and the deli meat and all the soft cheese you can think of.  I'm going to guzzle caffeine and alcohol and I'm going to like it.  Right now I'm sitting on the couch drinking a rum and diet coke and eating raw cookie dough with a side of sashimi (I'm really not but I could if I wanted to).  So there pregnant people, SO THERE.

It's fine, we don't want any babies up here anyway.  I mean why would we?  They aren't cute or snuggly or life-fulfilling or anything, right?!  You hear me Universe?  Don't you send me those babies because I'm too busy eating my blue cheese undercooked burger.

Ugh.

I'm having a hard time these days trying to figure out that perfect little balance of optimism and realistic expectations and attainable goals.  Is it too much to ask to get pregnant and finally finally get some babies up in here?  Maybe it is.  Maybe I've got to stop asking and start letting it all go with the flow.  But we all know how well this little control freak does with the letting go.

Lately I'm grasping for signs.  Signs that my body can work the way its supposed to (it appears that with a few medications it definitely can), signs that I'm making the right adulty choices, signs from God that I'm in the right place, signs that fat rolly polly babies are in my future.  I have a cramp - that's a sign!  I saw a baby and didn't burst in to tears - its a sign!  My mom dreamt I was pregnant - definitely a sign. I'm hungry, i'm tired, i'm emotional, i'm happy - signs signs signs.  Perhaps the problem is that it appears the signs are in another language.  One I clearly don't speak.  In fact I'm pretty sure the signs are in hieroglyphics and I don't have the key...no way to translate them.

So I've decided to stop praying for signs and instead start praying for clarity and patience and peace.  I'm the queen of telling other people that "things will work out" that there are "divine plans for all of us" that things will always "come to pass as they should"  and yet I'm clearly not honoring that belief myself.

So I'm making a change.  This month we're letting it all go and in turn letting it all come.  I'm going to be more gracious, more patient, more loving and more open.  I refuse to let the pessimism take me over - because I'm pretty sure that's not doing me any favors - and it's just not me.

I will be a mother.  Some day.  Some how.

And until then.....

Blue cheese sushi baby!

Apples and Pumpkins and Monkey's oh my!

So per prediction this little blog will include last weekend's antics and the weekend before that, I apparently run a week (or 2) behind in blog world.

The Saturday before last we went on our yearly trek up to Apple Country with SP's family.  They decided they have been going for 20yrs now (wow!) every year.  I on the other hand have only been going for 3 years and it definitely hasn't lost its charm on me.  I love the apple products (hello fritters), the screaming children, and the cute shops.  This year was no exception.  We beat the crowds, ate several apple doughnuts and watched some adorable kids wiggle around for quite some time.  And all in 75 degree weather - pretty glorious.

 These boys, they love their videos!

Sunday we carved pumpkins, as this is the only Halloween tradition that I enjoy!  Mostly because then you get pumpkin seeds.

This weekend was jam packed.  

Thursday night was Halloween, and since we know how I feel about Halloween (no.), we went little kid Halloweening instead.  Some of our friends were kind enough to invite us over for dinner (or indulge us in inviting ourselves over!) where we got to see one stinkin cute monkey and hand out candy to several other candy hungry cuties.

Monkey Man!

First tastes of candy, mmmm!

Friday night we spent an evening with friends and met the newest member of the club!  He is only 3.5 days old in these pictures and practically perfect in every way.  Needless to say, I can't get enough of the snuggles.

She looks good with a baby doesn't she?!

I love this furbaby too!

 So much baby cuteness!

Saturday was SP's Birthday!  SP isn't a big birthday celebrator but I think it's important to celebrate each other and these beautiful lives we have the honor of living.  So I honored SP's life by first letting her sleep in as long as she wanted (pretty a-typical around these parts as I get bored and our dog is NEEDY!)  Then we ate some lunch and went to a really fun volleyball game.  After that we took a little nap and then went out to dinner at a newish southern food restaurant nearby.  And let me tell you what.  Pickle Chips my friends.  Pickle chips sound disgusting but they are actually from heaven.  My last words on the subject - Pickle chips amen.  The fried chicken, the gouda grits the garlic mashers there are no words except that it was A-to-the-mazing!  

Volleyball Selfie!

Possibly the best birthday present ever!

Birthday Baby!

 

Southern food coma

After dinner we rolled out (literally because my stomach was by then the size of the Hindenburg) and walked over to the day of the dead celebration going on that evening.  If you've never been to a Dia De Los Muertos celebration I highly highly recommend you find one next year.  It is a touching holiday about celebrating the lives of loved ones who have passed on.  Families build beautiful alters and provide offerings to the spirits of their loved ones.  I love all of it.  I love the connection to family, the brightness, the decor, the dancing.  It's not sad at all - its festive and celebratory and gorgeous!

And this week is shaping up to be jam packed as well with another friend dinner and baby snuggles (I'm a junkie, what can I say) and our first off Broadway Show of the season Priscilla Queen of the Desert.  Which neither of us have ever seen and we know nothing about - but we bought season tickets and the reviews seem pretty awesome - and really I saw Xanadu on off Broadway so there is no way it can be as bad as that!

Hope the falling back went well for everybody this weekend, it's a gnarly adjustment for this insomniac, but I'm getting there.  Although the darkness at 5pm definitely is not my favorite.  Here's to hoping I can stay awake past 7:30pm this week!